i stumbled across this gem of a story on the interwebs and boy howdy, it's a bit hard to take.
the reader's digest version is that a doctor in romania was performing a delicate surgery to correct some dude's lumpy, disfigured ballbag when he fucked up and cut the guy's urinary channel. so, as one does in that situation, he reacted by cutting off the poor guy's dick in front of what i presume was a rather shocked operating room. a bit uncalled for in my opinion, but hey, i wasn't there.
*as an aside, ballsacks are already lumpy and ugly. what special kind of fucked up does your scrote have to be before you have elective surgery? but alas, that is neither here nor there.
so if you asked me any given morning, "what's the worst thing that could happen to you today?", after the usual things regarding the health of my loved ones, my answer would have to be, "well, i guess i could get my dick chopped off".
and that's where this guy was, even though he was probably asleep and didn't know it yet. dick severed. can't get any worse right? if you thought so, you lack imagination, something this doctor did not. in his rage, he "placed it on the operating table where he chopped it into small pieces before storming out of the operating theatre at Bucharest hospital".
could you run that last part by me again?
cutting it off didn't satisfy his need to vent? he had to treat the dingus like a fucking piece of chicken at benihana? did he make a little volcano out of onions and flip shit up into his hat as well? fuck doc, it's a dick, not a ginsu knife demonstration.
so what was his punishment? did the patient get to dip a rusty knitting needle in battery acid and shove it in the doc's peehole? did he get to feed the doc's balls to a piranha while the doctor watched all clockwork orange style? nope, 100,000 pounds in damages and his medical license suspended. that's it. now i'm sure that 100K pounds in romania would buy a whole lot of gypsies, but does it really pay for having to face the rest of your life with a penis sculpted like gumby with tissue from your arm? the two words i'm looking for are fuck and no.
they said the doctor "had been under stress". when i'm under stress, i have a drink or work out. what i don't do is prepare a single serving of diced dickmeat.
i hope one day the romanian john wayne bobbit finds this guy alone in a crowded alley. and i hope he doesn't use anesthesia.
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